10 Phrases You Need to Know to Get Ahead in Business

Going Forward

Of all of the phrases that are pointless, meaningless and overused, “going forward” really is the highest ranker. Initially, it came in as a substitute for “in the future,” referring to plans to progress projects, etc. Of course, it’s not really about going forward in any sense other than chronologically, because much corporate activity is about dressing up the same carp to look different. Never mind the fact it still exudes the same aroma of fish. Why “going forward” has gained such popularity is beyond me. Why not say “in the future” which has the same number of syllables, or something meaningful dependent on the context its being used? Time was when context mattered. But going forward has gone viral. It’s become the “erm” of the corporate world. It’s a phrase, a sentence and a full stop in itself. “We’ll book a telecon to discuss it going forward.” “Yeah, book me in on my diary going forward.” As such, it’s become a cliché. More than that, its ubiquitous use has stripped it of any meaning.
Having heard the phrase used in interviews on the news recently, it appears that “going forward” has actually seeped into the real world.

Reinventing the Wheel

Reinventing the wheel is something that no sensible person would attempt. And most corporate bods are sensible enough to realise this. And not reinventing the wheel is something you’ll find managers bragging about. It’s a new approach, but they’re not trying to reinvent the wheel. Having said that….

Avoid Fillers

People pause and hesitate in conversation all the time. Sometimes it’s because they’re struggling for the right word. Sometimes it’s simply out of habit. In linguistics, vocalised hesitations are referred to as “fillers.” According to Michael Larcombe writing in New Scientist in 1995, “silence is often construed as a signal that the current speaker is ready to give up his or her turn. So, if we wish to continue our speaking turn, we often need to fill the silences with a sound to show that we intend to carry on speaking.” But there probably aren’t many linguistic experts in the corporate world, which is why when call centre staff are trained, they are instructed to avoid “foghorning.” This is presumably because protracted “eeeeer” sounds are a little like foghorns. Ok. But it’s also perhaps unsurprising that speakers of different languages use different sounds as fillers, which renders the term meaningless when used in training notes for staff in call centres based in India. Imperialism – or unfathomable ignorance – remains rife.

It’s On My Radar

A statement you’ll hear countless times when travelling by train within earshot of a corporate cock is, “Yeah, yeah, it’s on my radar…” A favourite of the inept and those who prefer to look busy rather than actually doing anything.

Car-Park That

I suspect that most normal people consider a car-park to be a large flat place where drivers park cars. The clue’s in the name, really. But if someone says they’re going to “car-park that” during a meeting, it’s probably not a good sign. On the surface, it’s

Put It On Ice

To me, a freezer is a domestic appliance that keeps foodstuffs cold, thus preserving them. The principle is extended in the business world to refer to keeping an idea fresh but inactive. Or something. A variation of the real-world term whereby something such as a project is put “on ice,” putting it in the freezer is much snappier and inventive, and provides a neat alternative to car-parking, or a “cooler” alternative to the back burner.

Be Progressive

The corporate world is big on buzzwords. Nevermind if they’re meaningful or used sincerely. Image is everything. Substance is for other people to worry about. Yes, the box is empty, but it looks nice from the outside, so people are going to be happy to pay through the nose for it. And they’re supposed to be thinking outside the box anyway, so what does it matter what’s inside? Progressive is one such buzzword. Companies like to appear “progressive” – whatever that means. As far as I can tell, it means they’ve found new ways of screwing people over and making as much profit as possible for delivering the minimum of service or product they can get away with.

High-Level Stuff

High Level – serves to reinforce the us and them division between managers and the chairpounders who aren’t important enough or savvy enough to understand what the upper echelons of an organisation discuss behind closed doors. The meeting’s all about high-level stuff… we’ll break it down and roll it out to staff once we’ve fully digested the implications of the implementing the strategy moving forward. What they really mean is that because they don;t actually do the work, they haven’t got a clue, and so talk about things broadly and vaguely with no idea of whether or not it’s physically possible. So, “we need to make a saving in this area of £6.2M. if we reduce the staffing levels by 60% that should do it.” Yeah, but the work volume’s still there. But that’s not for the people on the shop floor whose jobs are on the line to worry about, because it’s high level. The penpushing proles wouldn’t understand.

Pushing the Envelope

The implications of pushing the envelope sound very like passing the buck. But no, It’s going beyond the established boundaries. So why not pushing the boundaries or parameters rather than some meaningless metaphorical envelope?

Knowledge is Power

Sometimes there just isn’t a carp metaphor or catchphrase that fits the bill. I’ve overheard managers on phone calls, in telecons or even in meetings foundering for a phrase that sounds impressive and serves to cover the fact they haven’t a clue what they’re talking about. “yeah, yeah, I’ve not really got so far going forward on this one, it’s got a lot of chefs on it and I didn’t want to step on anyone’s toes. I’m still trying to capture down the soft knowledge, and it’s on my radar…”

But why? Knowledge is power. If you know the code, are privy to the important, “key concepts” you can speak in a manner that sets you apart from the plebs, the drones on the bottom rungs, and those who aren’t in the world of business. And in doing so, it’s possible to demonstrate that knowledge and radiate signals that you therefore have the power. So, remember and use these phrases in interviews, in meetings, or loudly while loitering at the coffee machine and you’ll go far.