I Don’t Have Time for Stems and Seeds

Life in this day and age is like a cheap bag of weed. If you bought a bag and had to spend more than an hour picking and sifting through all the stems and seeds just to get to the good stuff, you haven’t just wasted your time, you’ve gotten ripped off. Well, life is kind of like that bag. So many stems and seeds. The stems and seeds of life, however, are advertisements, commercials, billboards, radio announcements, signs – everywhere. And it takes a lot of time and effort to sift through all that minutia just to get to the good stuff, the things that really matter. I get so tired of the bombardment of information – coming at me from all directions. I can’t even go to a high school football game anymore without commercials on the scoreboard. No, I’m not talking about billboard advertising, I’m talking about a miniature Jumbotron with hi-def video, and in-between instant replays, a commercial runs advertising none other than the doctor who donated the scoreboard in the first place. As if his name plastered all over the perimeter of the mini-Jumbo wasn’t enough!

This world is so noisy too. Noise, noise, everywhere I turn. I can’t walk into any shop or store without some sort of noise coming out of speakers that dot the ceiling. Music, advertisements, announcements, pages. I no longer enjoy going to chain restaurants like Chili’s or Applebee’s – I don’t enjoy speaking loudly just so the person across from me can hear what I’m saying. And those birthday songs…AHHHHHHHHHH! Those people should all be shot.

And the cell phones…

Television is even worse. That, right there folks is lethal advertising. I should know, I fall victim to it quite frequently. (I wonder if there’s a 12-step program for that.) And don’t get me started on all those auto dealer commercials during the evening news. Are those the most annoying commercials, or what? And I’m sure you have noticed how long television commercials have gotten lately. No wonder I have ADD – as soon as a commercial comes on I grab the remote and start clicking. It irritates me even more when all channels decide to show commercials at the same time. It makes me wonder why actors keep getting paid more while TV shows are getting shorter and shorter. Remember when cable was commercial-free? I want that back! XM Radio, for crying out loud, has commercials. Good grief! No wonder I spend so much time on my computer. I have nearly complete control over the advertising content I view. I don’t have to watch TV full of commercials. I can watch many current TV episodes online or rent them on DVD, commercial free.

I don’t have time to process all the marketing information out there. The stems and seeds. I just want the good stuff. Is there a way I can upgrade myself to enjoy a commercial-free version of life? Which brings up my final thought. To enjoy many things commercial free, I have to PAY for it. I like the irony, though. Businesses pay to advertise to the public, and the public can pay not to see those advertisements. The people that created that concept are geniuses. Very wealthy geniuses who make their millions providing commercial-free alternatives, yet to get business they themselves rely on advertising. Oh, shut up already!

My name is Joanna Barnett, and I approve this blog J